How To Break Up With Your Trainer


There are quite a few great trainers out there who not only motivate their clients to go past their limits but also make it a welcoming environment. There are some trainers however who have knowledge down but can’t really grasp how to change their motivation styles to meet each clients needs. Why would you want to keep paying a trainer that makes you hate fitness every step of the way? Fitness is a lifestyle that should be thought of as a long-term routine than just a seasonal fad after all.

With my experience as a gym manager and personal trainer, it’s really hard to narrow down one way to correctly “break up” with your trainer since a lot of gyms have different “corporate” structures. Even the small “Mom & Pop” gyms have some type of protocol of how they handle their trainers and staff. The best way to approach all of this is do what is most comfortable with you but at the same time do not leave the trainer hanging on what’s going on. Contacting the trainer directly is a more concise approach and if they’re a good trainer they will ask what they can improve on and then move on to the next client while learning from their mistakes.

Her are some tips of how you should structure your message to your trainer no matter what platform of communication you use:

  1. Be concise (Not blunt)
  2. Tell them why: Even if you say “I just don’t feel motivated” at least it tells the trainer that they were using the wrong motivational tools to inspire you.
  3. Thank them. It helps sugar coat the breakup but at the same time it acknowledges that you are thankful for the work that they put in.
  4. If they gave you stuff like bands, dumbbells, yoga mats, give it back. It’s like when you break up with your significant other, a new beginning isn’t possible without getting rid of everything that reminded you of them.
  5. Make sure you check the contract you signed. If the contract says you have to stay with that specific trainer for the paid duration, then it’s best to go straight to management. Most gyms will want to keep you happy and let you change to another trainer.

Successful trainers are rare and in a saturated market, getting your name out there is extremely hard. It’s a fun and challenging endeavor where very few people can handle that type of pressure. As a trainer you not only have to worry about getting new clients but also keeping your current ones. A lot of corporate structures also make it extremely hard for trainers to make a living wage. A gym can fire a trainer without much notice so the pressure is always present.

Here are a few other suggestions on best ways to communicate on each type of platform available:

Email: This is where you can write 300-400 words and get all the necessary messages across. Make sure you keep this professional and constructive since most gyms keep a carbon copy as a legal document of contractual termination between the client and trainer.

Text: Yes, you CAN text your trainer but make sure you reference the email. One thing to consider is some trainers will take the drama a little too far when you do it this way. Just make sure you keep it as concise as possible and immediately end the conversation as soon as you can so it’s less awkward.



In other words email and text are the only appropriate way to end your relationship. Any other platform is unprofessional and it’s wrong because it is public.

I wonder what all my trainer friends out there have to say about this.


By: Kevin Khlom

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